Sunday, October 3, 2010

Think Before You Wed

Hi All! Sorry for the lack of posting lately. Grad school has started again and I was in a bit of a pickle at work that was eating my soul. Luckily, I've given myself a mental pep talk, turned the corner, and now I'm off and running again. I promise more posts this week, but in the meantime, here are some thoughts for today.

Last weekend, I had a girls night with some of my co-workers, one of whom has been dating her boyfriend for 18 months. Somehow, we started talking about how you know if the person you are dating is the person you will marry. Represented in the group were women who had been married anywhere from 4 months to 8 years, so I feel we had a somewhat wide range of experiences to work with. I get asked all the time how Kev and I knew we were ready to get married. I'd like to tell those of you pondering that question that there was one magical moment that made me realize that I wanted Kev to be mine forever, but the truth is a lot more complicated. I can't point to any one thing that makes Kev perfect for me, but I do have a little checklist that the ladies and I came up with that may help.

10 Signs You Should Probably Put a Ring On It:
1) The person you are dating is the first person you call with good or bad news. Or irrelevant news. Or puns. Or for no reason at all.
2) Running errands with that person is something you enjoy doing. Because if you get married, you will have a lot of conversations about boring things, and need to make a lot of mundane decisions (which brand of cat litter to use, should you upgrade your toilet plunger, etc.) together.
3) You would be happy to spend the rest of your life with the person you are dating TODAY. Believe me, the person you walk down the aisle towards will not magically change with the signing of a legally binding piece of paper. When you get married, you will still have the same blessings and problems that you did before you took the plunge. Trust me on this.
4) You have a good belly laugh with that person every single day.
5) You have woken up next to each other and not been grossed out.
6) You can tease your significant other, but damn it if someone else makes a joke that hits a little too close to home, you ferociously defend that person.
7) You've talked about money and can live with the fallout from that conversation. (Side note: Kev had no idea that women's haircuts usually cost more than 20 bucks. He still fails to understand why I refuse to get my hair cut at Supercuts with me, or why I shop at stores besides Kohls for my clothes.)
8) You realize that this person will be your plus one to almost all the events you go to, and it doesn't make you cringe. This includes family events, weddings for people neither of you really like, and extremely boring and shmoozy work functions.
9) You've eaten each other's cooking and lived to tell about it.
10) You realize creating a healthy marriage and creating a beautiful wedding are not the same thing.

Now tell me, what am I leaving off the list?

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