Weekend Update

I'm not going to lie, I've got a case of the Mondays today. Maybe because I had such an awesome weekend, but still. The older I get, the harder it is for me to bounce back from a super booze-filled weekend. Let me give you a brief re-cap:

Friday night, Kev and I went to go see Rise Against, a band that we've (especially Kev) are getting more and more in to due to the social justice themes happening in their pulsating rock songs. I love a band that shares the same values of equality for all, eating mindfully, and rocking socks off. We were surrounded by mini-vans as we drunkenly staggered to the UIC pavilion after finding a bar with amazing liquor deals, which was weird. Thank goodness my lovely brother in law had enough sense to buy us seats, rather than floor/mosh pit spaces, when he purchased them as our Christmas gift. I'm too freaking old for that nonsense. Overall, it was an amazingly high-energy and thought provoking show.


Saturday, we went to a friend's baby shower. More and more, people around me are announcing pregnancies. Every time someone does, I think "wait, we're too young! Wow!" Then I realize that I am turning 28 my next birthday, which is a perfectly respectable age at which to have a baby. Maybe I'm just immature. For said baby shower for some dear friends, I purchased a Blackhawks outfit similar to this....

....because clearly I enjoy making the babies in my life look like old Italian men. Maybe for his first birthday, I'll get him some gold chains. This kid is certainly lucky to have me in his life.

Saturday night, we went and saw Bye Bye Liver, a semi-improv drinking play that I cannot recommend highly enough. Housed at Fizz restaurant's upstairs stage, this play features hilarious skits about drinking, whole-audience drinking "socials" and a cast that gets progressively drunker as the skit goes on. The ticket stub says "admit one person who should probably let their sponsor know where they are" and that says it all. If you've spent a large amount of time in your life at bars, you'll recognize the behavior they lampoon, and I don't think it was overly promotive of alcoholism. If you are in the Chicago area, you must go see this reasonably priced show with a group of friends. We went for a friend's birthday, but there were also many bachelorette parties and 21st birthday partiers in the crowd. I definitely want to take my younger siblings when they turn 21, and would love to see it again. Plus, they have an awesome hipster guy on a Casio keyboard providing musical backup throughout the show. What's not to love?

Overall, I'd have to say it was a pretty damn good weekend. Today, I'll be heading back to the gym to get my rear in gear after two particularly lackluster weeks of healthy eating/working out. Work is actually calming down somewhat, so I'm feeling a little more able to get back on track with my goals.

What was the best part of your weekend?
What is your favorite item of baby apparel to purchase for a baby shower?
Do you ever get friend crushes?

Found Downtown

Wordless Wednesday is a meme followed by photographers and lovers of art around the globe. Join in!

Daddy Daughter Date

One of the weird things about growing up is that you don't often get your family to yourself. One of the mixed blessings of having rheumatoid arthritis, is that if you play it right, you can fix that. Allow me to explain...

Kev and I have known each other since I was fourteen and he sixteen. As soon as he got his driver's license, he would drop by my house at odd times. Right after school. On weekends. 8:00 at night, it didn't matter. It wasn't too long before my parents just accepted him as a normal fixture in our home. When we started dating nine years later, it is entirely possible that he and I were the only two surprised by the outcome.

Now, after two and a half years of marriage, Kev is nearly always by my side when I spend time with my family. We live an hour south of them, and while we try to go home for major events, it's almost always accompanied by my siblings, grandparents, or cousins. While I love this, it makes it kind of rare for us to get some quality couple-to-couple time with my parents. Rarer still are the opportunities to spend time just with my mom or dad. Or just me and my parents. Etc, etc.

After my two year anniversary of my RA diagnosis, I began wheedling my dad into getting checked out by my arthritis doctor. My dad exhibits many of the same symptoms I do, and it seems to be getting worse with age. Finally, I convinced him to go. A few days later, he called me excitedly. "Colie," he gushed, "I got the appointment RIGHT AFTER YOURS for my follow-up! How cool is that?" At the time, I merely laughed. We would certainly be the two youngest people in the waiting room. Maybe we could even get a discount. BOGO? Twofer?

The appointment finally rolled around last night, and I have to admit it was pretty awesome. My dad and I got to hang out in the waiting room together, and catch up on life. My dad sat in on my appointment. As a pediatrician, it meant a lot to have him listen to what the doc was telling me, rather than regurgitating it to him on the phone days later. Afterwards, we went to dinner. We laughed, we joked. Just my daddy and me.

I've been a proud daddy's girl for most of my life. I'm so blessed to have him in my life, and today I find myself strangely grateful to my chronic pain disease for giving me the chance to get him all to myself. Just my daddy and me.

Friday Reads-Love Times Three

Last weekend, Kev, me, and three of our friends headed up to Wisconsin for a fat kid, sweatpants, green shot drinking, Packers losing weekend. It was awesome. Even more awesome was the fact that somewhere in all the gorging, I managed to wipe the Cheeto dust off of my fingers and finish Love Times Three a book written by four people involved in a polygamous marriage.


I have to admit, the topic of polygamy has intrigued me ever since I read Under the Banner of Heaven by Jon Krakauer While I firmly believe that people are people, no matter what their views, I've always been sort of skeptical of the assertions that sister-wives (wives who share the same husband) really have a strong, emotional, and equal bond with their shared husband. The women of Love Times Three (heretofore referred to as LTT) really do seem mostly like normal folk. They rely on their shared calendars and BlackBerries to make sure everyone in the home gets where they need to go, they struggle with weight and faith, their teenagers drive them crazy, and they have strong opinions on faith, values, and family time. I respect the fact that these women braved the personal and professional perils to tell their story, after being concerned with all the recent negative media coverage. They are also the inspiration for the HBO series Big Love


The women acknowledge that three wives= three times the drama, but fail to go into real depth when describing their family struggles and sometimes I found everything a bit too peach-keene for my taste. However, one woman asks a question that really made me sit up and take notice:


How is my husband's love for me diminished if he loves another woman just as much? Does it cheapen my relationship with him to know that he has deep and abiding love for another? No, no it does not.


And this, my friends, is how I know I am meant to stay monogamous.


I've learned a lot about marriage in the last two and a half years. I've learned that being selfish doesn't serve anybody. That neither my husband nor myself are perfect. That jealousy comes from insecurity. And yet, I feel blessed every day that Kev and I have entered this agreement together. That come what may, he will love many other people in his lifetime but none with the odd cocktail of passion, silliness, intellectual stimulation and physical need that he loves me with. If I knew he also had another wife living concurrently in the same house as us, I don't think I'd be able to keep myself out of the equation. While I'm sure his relationship would be different with Polygamous Polly than it would be with me, we would all be sharing the title of marriage, and equally responsible for making it work EVEN THOUGH we only knew 2/3 of the story. Yes, parents often realize they can love a second or third child as much as they do the first, but I don't know that I'd be able to offer the same generosity of spirit if it came to another woman joining our covenant.


The vacillation of opinion that I've expressed already in this post (between appreciating that people in this great country are entitled to live their lives as they see fit, that everyone's lives are more normal than they seem, and that I believe that the definition of a marriage changes if you invite more than two people into it) characterizes my experience of reading this book. It wasn't terribly well written, or terribly deep, but it made me feel grateful for the opportunity to grapple with these questions. It also made me grateful to get my husband to myself most nights. Definitely an engaging non-fiction read, if not Pulitzer Prize material.


Are you a jealous partner? Do you agree or disagree with the quote above? Why? Respectful thoughts only, please!

Wordless Wednesday

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Shifty Eyes

I've always known that I was an awkward person. When I was in junior high, I once lamented to my mom that I wasn't cool or popular. Sternly, she said me down and said, "Nicole, your father isn't cool. I'm not cool. Chances are, you won't be cool either. Challenge yourself to be something else instead." True story, and words to live by.

But this post isn't about heartwarming memories with mom. It's about the fact that the older I get, the more awkward I realize I really am. I find myself constantly saying "shouldn't I know this by now?" or "really, this still happens when you are 27?"

The big issue I have with myself these days is eye contact. I've realized that I'm really not very good at maintaining eye contact with others. I'm noticing it the most at work. I'm not sure if it is because I am in a new building where I don't know people well yet and I'm still jockeying to figure out my niche, or if it's because I spend most of my time teaching my awkward posse in a fairly secluded basement room, but I've realized that I often don't make or keep eye contact with my colleagues. Today, for example, I met with the Assistant Principal and a Special Ed teacher, both of whom I have spent time with socially and feel fairly comfortable with, to translate a conference call to a Spanish-speaking parent. I spent the whole conversation swiveling between forcing myself to look at the two lovely ladies, and swiveling to thoughtfully address my Spanish comments to the phone. Awk-ward.

In hallways, or meetings also, I feel like I'm really bad about looking at the people talking to me. I'm not sure if it is that I feel uncomfortable because I don't know them well, or if I feel like my glasses (which I've been sporting recently) are a shield or what, but I'm turning into a bit of a spaz.

Why is it that we find it so awkward to look people in the eyes? Are eyes really the mirror to the soul? Am I shyer than I previously thought? How do you force yourself to look at the people who are talking to you? I call my kids out on it constantly, but I can't seem to do it myself. I don't want to be the weird shifty-eyed girl at work. HELP.

Wordless Wednesday (One Day Late)

Thus, I have worn leggings and drapey tops for the last week. Christmas is gone but the chub still remains

Fear of Failure

I am a teacher. i am also the most miserable person in the world to teach.

As the quarter nears completion, my students are stressing about grades. C, one of my trickier pals, checked his grades and bluntly announced "Mrs. G., I'm going to get a C in Science. There's no way I can get a B. I'm bad at Science. So, I'm not even going to try anymore."

As I gave C the whole 'are-you-getting-extra-help-put-in-the-effort-it-will-pay-off speech, I realized who he reminded me of. Myself. I get frustrated easily, and if I'm not immediately good at something, I give up. I tell people I don't want to play pool, or softball, or original Mario brothers, and then I sit lonely and bored on the sidelines while my friends hoot and holler and hustle. I get bored, and depressed, all while maintaining a too-cool facade. I know that with practice I would be a decent player; I also know it is no fun to lose or be the cause of a loss. I'd rather be bored than lose a trivial bar game or make my friends mad. How stupid is that?

Malcolm Gladwell says that it takes 10,000 hours of practice to become an expert at something. Why am I so afraid to be exposed as a fraud that I don't even attempt a single one? Why am I so insecure that I feel my friends and family won't want to play with me if I'm not perfect? Most importantly, why am I infuriated when my students are unwilling to try again after failure, but I'm of the same mindset in my personal life?

I'm done being content with excluding myself. With focusing on the things I'm good at, and hiding from the rest. I'm patient with my students, and now it's time to put in the slow, plodding, patient work on myself. I need to learn how to cultivate a less than perfect, more positive psyche.

Good things are coming for me in 2012- I can feel them. I'm ready to grow and learn. To make mistakes. To stop being such a pain in the ass. To start listening. To be teachable. Now I just need to find someone with the patience to teach me....

28 for the New Year

Hello Imaginary Friends!

My apologies for yet another list-style post. I promise I'll get back to some actual blog content soon. In the meantime, I've been inspired by other people's to-do lists to accomplish 28 goals for 2012. Why 28? That's how old I'll be on my 2012 birthday this year. Feel free to skim or skip, I know I'm one of 294083905 resolution list posts this week. I'd try to think of something more clever for today, but, well, if I don't write it here, I won't do it.

Fitness and Eating
1. Hire and work with trainer Thwomp (real name: Steve) once a week to make my gym workouts more effective.
2. Track my food and water on SparkPeople at least four times a week to avoid long periods of unhealthy eating.
3. Cook one meal per week- no more letting Kev do it!
4. Try to log 180 minutes of exercise a week. 180/week = 730/month = 8760/year. YAY!
5. Register for and complete a sprint triathlon this summer

Work
6. During the hour after school, when you don't have meetings, grade papers! Avoid those pile ups.
7. Finish Special Education classes (3 to go!)
8. Update certifications- move from initial to standard teaching and add your Reading Specialist degree.

House
9. Print and frame black and white photos. Hang.
10. Write down the money you spend daily.
11. Clean 2 hours per week (ideally divide into 20 minute daily chunks so you don't self-destruct)
12. Get a recycling bin and use it.
13. Sort old books. Take to MarketFresh Books in Evanston to sell. Open account and buy your new books there.
14. Get rid of random crap. Donate or eBay it.

Reading
15. Read 52 books this year.
16. Read 10 non-fiction
17. Read 10 recommended titles from BookLust
18. Finish A-Z and Chunkster reading challenges.
19. Post bite-sized reviews of each book finished on twitter.

Photography
20. Use Groupons for date night photo class and Chicago photo class prior to going to Peru.
21. Practice! Take camera out with you more often!
22. Start a habit of posting nearly wordless posts on blog.

Personal
23. Make a plan to study and practice more Spanish. If you don't use it.....well...you know...
24. Plan a weekend getaway somewhere new in the U.S. with Kev.
25. Do something spiritual daily.
26. Go to mass twice a week.
27. Go to PERU!!!
28. Talk to each grandma once a month.

So there you have it, my big messy list of goals. I'm hoping to do a monthly post where I report progress, a la elefantitas alegres

What new habits are you attempting this year? How will they make life better for you?

Things I Didn't Do on my Winter Break

1) Blog....obviously. Oopsadoodle

2) Wake up early. Waking up in the dark, I sobbed. Why did awakening at 5:45 in January seem so much darker than awakening at 5:45 in December? Wah.

3) Go to bed sober. Our new trainer at the gym, a stern man shaped somewhat like this vintage Whomp-Whomp made Kev and I write down everything we ate and drank on Friday, Saturday, and Sunday. AKA New Year's Eve Eve, New Year's Eve, and Bears Sunday Funday. Ack. After perusing our list, he informed us that we probably consumed 15,000 in our constant holiday graze while buzzed. Whomp-whomp, indeed.

4) Cook often. Though I did make a couscous meal that registered somewhere between pickled herring and pizza-for-breakfast on the delicious scale. I'm hoping next time I can make some tweaks and nudge it closer to the pizza side of things.

5) Stress out. I had a great, relaxing, lazy weekend filled with love and laughter. I acted like a giddy, tipsy toddler with my siblings, an outlaw with my husband, and a micromachine with my friends. It was awesome.

6) Wear pants that buttoned. Sweatpants, hoodies, robes, leggings, and tunics allowed me to live in full denial of my holiday binge.

7) Anything productive. My house was a whirlwind, my professional laptop lounged in my professional bag, and emails went unanswered- all so I could read five books and watch three seasons of How I Met Your Mother. Legen....dary indeed.

8) Find the two facial products that I lost. Goodbye facial serum and day moisturizer. Hello, further Target debts.

9) Look at my credit card or bank statements. Too scary.

10)Travel. That staycation was so flipping worth it

Ten Tidbits

1) This week, we worked on video book reviews (a la Ebert and Roeper) for our final book projects in one of my LA classes. One of my students, a jolly and portly Asian fellow with a toothy grin, showed up in a starched, collared shirt and a festive tie. He explained that he "wanted to look handsome for Mr. Camera." Love.

2) My camera is slowly collecting dust and this is making me sad. Next week, I am off and Kev is working, and I plan to spend some serious time learning my craft behind the lens. Lord knows the photography on this here blog needs it.

3) I got the cutest tumblers for my mentor teacher, boss, and teaching assistant from Monogram Chick that look like this: (photo stolen from M.Chick- thanks!)

I am now super pissed that I didn't buy one for myself.

4) I am at the stage of Christmas shopping where I am seeing more for myself and less for others. It is getting hard to restrain myself from shopping for me. I'm such a selfish little grinch that way.

5) It is also starting to be the temperature where all I can think of is getting out of the midwest. We're planning to take a big abroad trip this summer (destination TBA, though I think we have it pretty much chosen), and the idea of not getting on a plane until July is frankly depressing.

6) Listen to me- bitch, moan, bitch. It's no wonder this blog has such a teensy following. Thanks for sticking around.

7) In my other LA class, we are working on writing critical reviews by writing food critiques. One day, my co-teacher was explaining some helpful tips for visiting a restaurant, and concluded with "there may be a small caveat to visiting a restaurant with a chatty friend- your notes may not be as thorough." Panicked, a (non-ELL boy) burst out "wait, WAIT! I don't even like seafood and you are asking me to eat CAVIAR- aren't those baby fish?!" Hilarious.

8) It is 50 degrees and rainy here. WTF snow? Where you at?

9) Peppermint Joe-Joes (Trader Joe's Oreos with peppermint candy cream) are my favorite thing in the world. I ate three of them at lunch and I feel no shame. Thank goodness for leggings and Uggs season.

10) Life is good, people. Life is really freaking good this holiday season. To say otherwise would be a lie.

What tidbits are floating around in your brain this week?

How To Kick a Cold

On Sunday, after a full weekend of holiday party-ing, I woke up with a throat tickle. Attributing it to a weekend full of yelling my witty insights to people in party- crowded rooms, I assumed it was nothing more than residual hoarseness. Alas, I was wrong. By Monday afternoon, I realized I may have a full blown cold on my hands.

The Christmas miracle? Today I am already feeling MUCH better. As a teacher, I have weathered my fare share of viruses that are just strong enough to make you miserable, but not quite strong enough to justify staying home sick and undertaking the loathsome task of writing sub plans. Generally, (knock on wood) I can kick said cold in about 48 hours. How do I do it you ask? Well, here is my arsenal:

First of all, I start chugging water like a madwoman. I am for 100-150 oz of water daily during my sick time. Yes, it is a ton of water. Yes, it makes me pee constantly. But for every little bathroom break I'm having, my body is flushing (hah!) away those nasty germs. It cleanses the system and helps kick my cold to the curb. It's free people, and it works.

Now these next few items will cost a teensy bit of cash, but they are so, so worth it. Most can be found at Walgreens. At work, I am talking constantly, and because of this, my throat gets terribly dry and scratchy. Over the years, I have tested many, many different cough drops, and these Halls Triple Soothing Action Cough Drops do the trick. Those little vapory guys in their assorted mint flavors make my nasty cold infested head into a little steam room. I also love that they come in multiple flavors and are sugar free. When you are consuming 5-6 a day, these things matter.

Next, I always snag the Vick's Sinex Day/Night Combo Pack I love that these bad boys don't require you to sign your life away at the register when purchasing, and having everything in one box is oh-so convenient. The day pills do a great job at opening up the sinuses and relieving headaches, while the night ones knock you out so hard that even your snoring husband won't wake you. Win-win. I use these round the clock, in conjunction with the Zicam Zinc Chewables. I find these to be much less offensively flavored than the dissolving tablets, and I've noticed that if used correctly (every 3 hours during the day, and for 2 days following the absence of cold symptoms) that they really do seem to help shorten the time you are wallowing.

The last three items on my walking dead survival guide are items of necessity. When I have a cold, I'm super paranoid about spreading it to others. Hence the Germ-X. I have a ton of people in and out of my room daily, and I'd hate to get them sick, which will mean I will get sick. It's a vicious cycle. I also hate having nasty cold dragon breath, so I keep Altoids on hand at all time. The zinc chewables leave you with nasty breath, and these certainly help. Lastly, when I'm sick I don't have much of an appetite, so these chocolate-mint Luna Protein Bars, weighing in at about 200 calories each, taste awesome and make sure that I get a good mix of protein and carbs.

So, there you have it. If you are stupid enough to go to work when you are under the weather like I am, use these easy, on the go tricks to get you back to your sassy self in no time. Your body, and your colleagues, will thank you.

I wasn't paid any money to endorse any of these products. I get asked often how I kick colds so fast, so I thought I'd write this post. I am also in no way a medical expert, so if you feel ill you should ALWAYS consult a doctor. Blogs do not have the answers. Doctors do.

'Tis the Season for Your Teacher

During my last five years of teaching, I have taught many grades in many different types of schools- everything from kindergarten to 8th grade. As such, I have received many different types of gifts from many different families. While I'm not a greedy person, I am always shocked to realize how many parents have a difficult time choosing gifts for their students' teachers. Rather than letting your child choose the gift (I have received Webkins, teddy bears, and Lip Smackers because of this tactic), peruse these lovely options so that your teacher's heart will be warmed this year.

1) Think books! Most classroom teachers purchase books and teaching materials with their own money throughout the school year. Many of these same teachers are avid readers. When I taught elementary school, many thoughtful parents donated their child's favorite book to the classroom library as a holiday gift, or got me gift cards to Barnes and Noble. I've also recently discovered eBookFling, an online book rental community for users of PCs, Macs, Kindles, Nooks, or iPads. For $36 dollars, your teacher can rent one book a month for twelve months. Each title rented appears on your reader or computer for two weeks, then vanishes. Awesome!

2) Skip the lotions and go for office supplies. I'm fortunate enough now to work at a school with more than ample supplies, but I'm still a sucker for a fun notebook, or a fancy clipboard. Paper Source has amazing file folders, fun stapler, scissor, and notepad sets, and cheery organizational tools that any teacher would love!

3) Think about what you know about your child's teacher. Last year, I was teaching with a friend who was recently exploring a vegetarian lifestyle. She was also the teacher to a set of twins. For the holidays, the twins' mom gifted my friend with a few tried-and-true vegetarian cookbooks that they use often in their home. My friend was ecstatic. Does your child's teacher enjoy running? Cooking? Photography? Spa days? What small gifts could you give related to his or her interests?

4) Magazines, magazines, magazines. Almost every male or female I know reads magazines, and subscriptions right now are often less than $20 a year. Rather than splurging on that lotion gift set (of which male or female, every teacher I know has at least 12) go for literacy. Again, make it something that your child's teacher is interested in. If you don't know your child's teacher that well, go for a professional magazine or a current events type magazine. We will thank you. This year, I drew my school's principal in our Secret Santa exchange. I know he loves to run, so each day I've been giving him either a fitness magazine or a protein bar. For the "big gift" at the end of the week, I found a running coolmax long sleeved shirt on super sale. Rumor has it, he is quite pleased with his haul so far. Everyone loves magazines, and everyone hates paying for them.

5) Cold, hard cash. Gift cards to teacher supply stores, general merchandise stores, or the ever popular Visa gift card go a long way. We don't care what the amount is, we just love the inherent splurge promised in the gift card.

Above all else, remember that your child's teacher is an adult. He/she also teachers multiple students. Take ten seconds to go beyond the usual gifting. You will make his or her day!

What tried and true gifts are always a hit in your gift-giving circles?

Friday Reads

Hey everybody! Can you believe it is time for another fabulous Friday Reads? This weekend, I'm hoping to finally finish the Everlost trilogy. I'm feeling a bit more inspired since hearing Neal Schusterman, the author, speak yesterday, but I'm still needing a little push. Then, to balance out my YA love, I'm going to sit down and read Schindler's List, in order to finally finish the Back to the Classics Challenge that I started earlier this year. I'm still not really sure what I'm planning to do as far as reading challenges, but I will keep you posted.

Last week, I finished reading A Gate at the Stairs by one of my all time favorite authors, Lorrie Moore. True to form, Ms. Moore did NOT disappoint. Her writing, quite frankly, humbles me, and she manages to find the poetic in the mundane. I loved here characters in this book, and the story, about a college student the year after 911 struggling with personal and societal identity crisis, veered into wild turns. Initially, I thought the book would be just another nannying-for-rich-people-helps-student-find-herself tale, but this book was so much more. While reading, I was forced to confront my personal attitudes towards race, war, and stereotyping, and I'm still pondering many of the themes of the book. Although A Gate at the Stairs was published 10 years after Moore's last book, it was hands down worth the wait. If you are an aficionado of thoughtful prose, or a lover of a book with themes that run deep, this is for you. It is the perfect antidote to all of the YA reading I have been doing lately.

What are you reading this week? Be sure to share on twitter with the hashtag #FridayReads to participate in an amazing community!

From the Darndest Places

It is no secret that I love my job. I am passionate about working with kids and teachers who challenge me, and I often find that I learn as much, or more about life from them than I teach them in return. It's a beautiful thing, and I would never, ever work in another profession.

This week, some great things were brewing in the Language Arts Department (of which I am a teensy, sort of part, since I teach a self-contained ELL LA class). Several teachers have recently participated in a conference, and wanted to de-brief some of their big thoughts. We began discussing our own personal reading and writing lives. Apparently, a presenter at one of the presentations had challenged this national group of Language Arts teachers, saying that if a teacher doesn't have a rich reading or writing life, how do they expect to authentically connect with and ameliorate their students' literacy lives? My mind was blown.

It sounds so simple. We teach. They learn. We coach. They rewrite. They read. We question. But really, it is so much more complex than that. How are we to challenge students to push beyond their previous inhibitions with genre or craft, if we aren't constantly pushing ourselves in new and strange directions? How can we create lifelong learners if we are disengaged with the world around ourselves?

The truth is, I am not often good at this. I come home from work tired, and want to wrap myself in my domestic cocoon rather than engaging with the outside world. On the weekends, I want to spend time with friends, not ponder my intellectual life or challenge myself. But to be a better teacher, I have to get beyond that. I have to do things that scare me. Practice language. Take risks. Write. Rewrite. Learn a skill. Listen. Be TAUGHT. I'm not very good at these things. I break down, I get humiliated, I am a poor sport when asked to participate in a game I'm not good at. I don't try. And yet, I would hate this same behavior in my students.

Self improvement goals come from the darndest places.

Are you a risk taker, or a rut finder?
What are you doing right now to challenge yourself?

10 Things-Randoms

1) Doesn't this blog look magnificent? I had been wanting to do a major blog overhaul for, well, ever, but don't have the html skills to really pull off doing it. Luckily Jessica at Diamond Doll Design ran a flash sale, and lo and behold, you are looking at the results. Thank goodness for the technologically savvy. I am certainly not one of them. Jessica was amazingly easy and speedy to work with. Huzzah!

2) Last night, I took a walk with a friend and we passed a festive Starbucks. In said Starbucks, there was an approximately four year old boy with his nose pressed up to the window and his tongue out, slowly licking the glass. Yikes.

3) Upon seeing said boy, I quietly thanked the Lord that I no longer teach kindergarten. My junior high kids have the good sense to keep their disgustingness a little more hidden.

4) As previously mentioned, we've been living a 90% vegetarian lifestyle. I've realized that while I have tons of energy, dinner options are limited. Leave a comment if you have a delicious meal for me to concoct.

5) I chopped my hair the Friday after Thanksgiving. Yesterday, had a poll open regarding Katy Perry's new hairdo. Methinks she stole mine. Harumph. See?

6) My mom would keel over if I showed up with platinum and pink hair for the holidays. I think it could be festive.

7) Kev has his fancy schmancy holiday party at the Museum of Contemporary Art on Friday. I may or may not have purchased a new dress that I may or may not now be concerned about fitting into.

8) I googled "ugly christmas sweater shops" and this popped up. What. The. Fudge.

9) I have been dragging myself out of bed this week and getting to school later and later. Oopsies. Bad Colie. Thank goodness traffic has cooperated and I haven't been late.

10) I have a meeting after school with a boss that terrifies me, so I spent way too much time this morning looking for a power outfit. Do other people do this, or am I a weirdo?

What random thoughts are you pondering today?
What does your power outfit look like? Mine almost always involves boots and a cardigan.

Friday Reads

Happy Friday all! I spent last week reading Eating Animals, and I already updated you on how it changed my life. Then, for some brain candy, I read Are You There, Vodka? It's me, Chelsea by the sometimes hilarious Ms. Chelsea Handler to empty my brain out. Empty is actually a good word to describe the whole book. The first five essays in it are, well, meh. Not hilarious, not inspiring, and more self-indulgent than anything else. Though the book picks up some steam by the end, I'm still not exactly impressed. Her first book, My Horizontal Life, is much funnier, probably because everyone has awkward sex stories that are relatable. Lord knows I certainly do.

Anyway, this weekend I am going to try and finish two books, one of which I have been positively aching for.

I have a huge writer crush on Lorrie Moore, ever since I read her short stories in my college Creative Writing Workshop course. Bonus points to Ms. Moore for being a college English (not creative writing!) teacher in her professional life. While this means that we have to wait a long time for her books, they are always filled with gorgeous writing, feminist themes, and thought provoking memories. This lady is magic, and inspires me to put a little more extraordinary into the mundane things I write on this here blog.

While I am so stoked for A Gate at the Stairs, it is definitely a book that needs to be savored in a quiet place, and since the bulk of my reading is done on my gray couch, surrounded by my fat cats, with Kev playing video games or watching terrible movies in the background, I also have Everfound, the final book in the Skinjacker trilogy by Neil Schusterman, on the back burner. I have to admit, I read this trilogy on the recommendation of one of the kids in my 8th grade LA class, who ranted and raved about them, and asked me if I had started them every day until I had no choice but to start for my own mental sanity. While I haven't fallen in passionate love with this trilogy (they are a little too over the top for me, and some of the characters could be developed better), I am excited to see how he wraps things up.

Don't forget to tweet your Friday Reads with the hashtag #fridayreads. More importantly, don't forget to read!

What are you reading this weekend?

Vegging Out

The reason I became a teacher is because I love to read. The reason I went through two years of grad school hell was to better help teacher struggling kids to love it, too. Reading transforms thoughts, reading inspires, reading changes you in ways you can't imagine.

Enter Jonathan Safran Foer's Eating Animals:

In Eating Animals, Foer writes a well researched account of the many factors that have led him to choose vegetarianism for himself and his family, in the hopes that his infant son may one day grow up and understand the philosophies that drive his family's food choices. Foer goes into the practices that drive factory farms, which produce so much of America's meats, and then delves into the mental and physical health repercussions for both people who process animals into our meat, and the effects that factory farming have on our planet as a whole.

Now, I will tell you, I am a bacon girl. A seafood girl. A sandwich piled high with meat gal. But after reading this book, I have gotten a lot more thoughtful about how my food is produced. Kev (the previously staunchest meat-eater I know, who used to make fun of me in our early dating days if I didn't order chicken or meat) inspired me to read this book, and together we have made some big changes to our eating. We've cut out meat entirely from our grocery runs, and we have begun buying free-range eggs (Foer mentions that free-range is essentially a hoax, but in the absence of farmer's markets in the winter, it is what we are doing). From now on, when I do eat meat or seafood, it is going to be for special occasions only, and I am going to make more of a concerted effort to find out where my food is coming from, and at what cost. I think most Americans are woefully out of touch with the food to table process, and I'm thankful that I read this book to help me think about it.

Do you consider yourself a food-aware person? Why or why not?

Have outside forces ever forced you to confront ugly truths about your eating?

Organization? Me?

Oh, friends, let me tell you. I suck at organization. My house is often hanging on by a thread. My work can quickly disintegrate into a pile of papers if I am not ever vigilant. I am a fly by the seat of the pants person. A procrastinator. Charmingly flighty. A hot mess. Call it what you will, but it drives my loved ones crazy sometimes. Poor Kev.

This year, however, I have a brilliant plan and I can't even believe how proud of myself I am. I made a list on Google Docs of people we needed to buy gifts for, and ideas that I had. THEN I shared it with Kev so that he could add/edit. Let me tell you, just having the list and some ideas jotted down has freed me. It isn't even December yet, and I have more than half of my shopping DONE. All of it was on sale. I am so freaking pumped that I can't even believe it.

More than that, having the extra time has freed me to get organized in other ways. Kev and I have decided that we are going to eat vegetarian (more on that tomorrow), and so today I made a shopping list. I even found two new recipes online and (wait for it) added the ingredients to my list. Holy freaking shit. I don't even know myself anymore.

I know you longtime readers of the blog hear me say all the time that I am turning over a new leaf, but its amazing how these two free, simple, stupid ideas have cleared up so much mental space in my brain. Can it really be that much easier to stay organized? How do I maintain this bliss?

What easy tricks do you used to stay organized? What are some stupid things that you know you should do and never quite get to?

Thanksgiving Wrap-Up

As a kid, I never really thought about Thanksgiving. It was nice. There were extra mashed potatoes and stuffing to be had. We ate. We thanked. We waited for Santa. The End.

Now, though, Thanksgiving has steadily moved up to my favorite holiday. We don't run around in a crazy Mimosa fueled sprint to see both sides of both of our families. We don't have the pressure of keeping everybody happy, or the need to organize endless lists of gifts for everybody. Instead, we get to spend quality time with the people we love while sleeping late and wearing stretchy pants. We catch up with our college-aged siblings and get coddled by our parents. We stop and think about what we've been through since last year and where we are going.

My students who are new to the U.S. were very perplexed by Thanksgiving, so we did a lesson. Pilgrims, Native Americans, travels to a new land, reasons to be thankful for new experiences. We watched Happy Thanksgiving, Charlie Brown, and the kiddos were perplexed by Lucy's meanness and Snoopy's lack of doglike qualities. Through it all, I was thankful for the new opportunity, and thankful for my professional journeys in the last year. When one of my kids said he was thankful for me, I realized that my own pilgrimage to a new school is starting to look like the best decision I never wanted.

As we started the Thanksgiving lesson, one of my students looked at me thoughtfully. "But, Mrs. Gas," she said, "why do Americans need one day to be thankful? Don't they just feel it always?" A million dollar question that I don't really remember having a good answer for. Why, indeed? Shouldn't we always be this vocal about our gratitude? Why don't we shout to the rooftops our love for our families, our gratitude for our physical situations and our thankfulness for life's changes? This Thanksgiving, I'm most thankful for the reminder to carry that attitude through more of my daily life.

I am truly blessed. Thank you, thank you, thank you to life and love and new friends and old friends, to family and students and kittens for reminding me of it.